Donkey Kong is a really huge candy bar sold only in Western Siberia. It's made from a locally produced fish oil paste dipped in powered sugar. The paste is made through a secret process invented in the mid-17th century.

It is rumored that the paste has no fish oil in it at all, but is really produced by some mixture of crushed ju-ju leaves and dehydrated Siberian Husky poop.


Donkey Kong is the number one selling snack candy in the Western Siberia area, however, attempts to export the product outside of Siberia have always failed due to the fact that the candy falls apart in temperatures higher than 30 below zero.

According to unverified reports, it's so cold in Western Siberia that no one can actually taste food, which accounts for the high volume of sales of Donkey Kong candy bars.