Harry Potter is an actor and singer who has starred in films such as The Wizard of Oz and Casino Royale, and provides the voice for protaganist Gordon Freeman in the Half Life series. He is also the 44th President of the United States.

Early Life[]

Harry Potter was born in Paris, France on February 18th, 1879 to Angelina Jolie and Regis Philbin. He claims that his parents died in a car crash when he was three, though he wonders why they're still with him now. Potter then lived with his uncle Sean Connery and aunt Celine Dion. He was tutored by a robot for eleven years after which time he attended Oxford, earning his Doctorate by the age of fourteen. At the age of fifteen Harry Potter attended Magik Skooling at an island close to Haiti where he was instructed by Invader Dartmouth-Katrina, a four-thousand year old Na'vi Sorceress from Pandora. There he was trained in the ancient "Order of the Lipids" where he learned his magic Vulcan capabilities of ALLLogic sorcery. After re-slaying Zombie-Grendel, Beo-Potter , I mean Potterwulf, I mean... Harry Potter.... at the age of sixteen, was accepted in to the "Intergalactic Space Wizards College" when he was given The Space-Warp Thingy by a magic carpet.

Early Stardom[]

Harry was cast in the lead role of "Yo Y.O." in the movie, "What a yo-yo." Harry was then asked to star in the 1925 remake of the hit movie The Godfather. He played the role of Mary J. Blige in The Godfather and recieved the Academy Award for Best Sandra Bullock Impression. He then starred in the title role in Wyatt Earp and played Bill Cosby in that movie. He recieved the Academy Award for Best Talk Show for his role in that film.

Harry's Big Break[]

Harry Potter got his big break playing the Tooth Fairy in The Wizard of Oz. He then starred in Casino Royale as Bugs Bunny. Harry then took a break from acting to record his debut album entitled Why do today what I can put off 'till tomorrow?.The album won a Grammy for Best Album To Play When You're Working Out. He then starred in the movie Annie Get Your Gun as Hannah Montana.

His political career didn't start until after he admitted to having hit himself in the head with a hammer in a Chinese Folk Custom for skin renewal. He was immeditaly loved by the Guns and Rifles Club, and the "I'm an Idiot" club.

Later Life[]

Harry Potter retired after several hundred years of dutiful loyalty to The Crown onboard the H.M.S.S. (Her Majesty's Space Ship) CannyMeetings as Captain Superior of HMSR (Her Majesty's Space-Realm) Harry S. Potter. He retired within proximity to Pandora and abandon Return Liscensure to Planet: Earth, taking up residence on Pandora the rest of his days. Harry Potter Died on Pandora during a local award ceremony when he was struck in the the head by Jessica Simpson with his own trophy.


  • Lord of the Rings
  • Narnia (series)